1/11/11

Here's another one...one, eleven, eleven...I love those crazy dates.
This year has been so smooth...my program (at work) re-launched with stores looking perfect (knock on wood)...no issues, all products, correct pricing - SO much better than last year.
Mark and I went on a date...like a WHOLE NIGHT BY OURSELVES date! My parents took all five kids overnight for us. Yes, all five. We are so appreciative of them for that. We used some of our Christmas gift cards to have a yummy dinner at the Cheesecake Factory, coffee at Caribou, followed by watching the Black Swan. AND THEN the best thing happened. We went home to a quiet house and talked and dreamed and even kissed a couple times :-) without interruption.
Here's the update on Operation Buy a House - I'm going to be brutally honest on this blog - because I want people to realize that you don't need to be rich with perfect credit to own a home. But you can't go around racking up bills that go unpaid and shred your credit so that you are not credit worthy at all. We had a tough go for a long time - with the five kids and most of the time a single income (our choice). Our credit did suffer. Not because we intentionally "screwed the system" or anything, just life happened. I love our lender. So many times when you have questionable credit - it's embarrassing to reach out to anyone and get the help you need. It's embarrassing to admit that you haven't done so well with finances. I'm in a good spot now - I love my job, the pay is great and we've been working on paying all of our bills ON TIME and not letting things go. We have tightened the belt with spending - thrifting, reusing, repurposing, green cleaning - all of these things have helped tremendously (so everyone thinking it is expensive to be "green" I have to disagree). Our lender pulled a copy of our credit report and gave us a plan to focus on 4 items: one medical bill, two small credit cards and one large card. By getting these 4 items in the right spot...it should put our credit in the right range. The good news: we paid the medical bill (sweet) - I contacted the company, got their address, the total of the bill, and a reference number. I made out the check and envelope (with stamp and everything) - even though I wasn't ready to pay...at - that - moment. However, as soon as I got a little money in my bank account, I popped the envelope in the mail. Then, there were no excuses - I HAD to account for that money being out of my account. I sent it out; however, it didn't end there. I became pro-active about my credit. I called the company to confirm that they did in fact receive the payment, asked if they could send me a receipt that the account was paid in full and asked them how quickly they would note that the account was positive on my credit report (30-days from payment). NICE!
We took another step forward and then one back (hey, it happens). We had made a large payment to one of the smaller cards - enough to put that card in the right range...YAY! But then our daughter's car broke down and she needed a temporary loan - of course we are going to help when/if we can. It took our entire payment (plus a little more...plus all of her money) to get her car fixed...OY! I'm so glad we could help her though.
Our reprieve...INCOME TAXES!!!! That's right people, I'm an income tax nerd. I've been stalking my company's ADP website - waiting for them to post last year's W2 forms. Guess what! They were posted! I immediately hopped onto TurboTax, completed my taxes and e-filed...I'm hoping to have the return by the end of Jan. (according to the IRS the first payout is 1/28...fingers crossed). So how much are we expecting? While I won't share the actual amount here - I'll just say that it's enough to put the two smaller cards into the range that our lender suggested AND take the larger card down about 1/2 way...NOT TOO SHABBY...
We'll spend the next couple of months taking every extra penny and putting it toward that large card...my nemesis. You want to know the strangest thing about this card though? The lender told us to not completely pay it off...to keep a balance on there. The reason: because we had previously closed the card, with the intention of paying it off...if we pay it completely, they will stop reporting our consistently on-time payments - so we get it low enough to be reasonable, not too high of a balance...once we buy the house, we can pay it off completely.
I'm expecting a yearly bonus in March/April of this year too...so that will go where it needs to - perhaps to pay toward the card?? perhaps to the bank, saving for closing costs...or the "what if"?? Our lender said she was working on getting us into a 100% financing program (I'm a first-time home buyer, female, looking to buy a small farm...lots of things working on my behalf); however, I still want to have money in the bank for a number of reasons...what if we find the PERFECT house and it is just a couple thousand outside of our lending approval amount??? What if we find the PERFECT house...except it needs appliances??? We just want to be prepared. Having our nest egg for Fresh Eggs Farm is a necessity for us. So things are looking good folks! I've been struck with the barnheart bug....
...Oh! After proof reading this, I seem to be saying "me" and "I" a lot - I don't want to sound like I am on my own here...Mark is of course along for every twist and turn of the ride...However, since he is currently not working, the loan will (most likely) be in my name...We are for sure in this completely together, we dream together, we work out every detail together...we agree to look at every house together, walk through the threshold together...and I can't wait.
Today, I leave you with a little house porn...these two make my heart pitter patter...

January First Two Thousand and Eleven

1/1/11

I'm a numbers person. I get excited about unique number combinations...especially on dates. Gage was born 8/8/98 at 8:16 am...Drake at 11/10/00...Cora was born on Kait's half birthday. I think about these things...and this year, this day being 1111 - that has got to mean something...right?
I feel like something HUGE is on our horizon. Work is going well and there are rumors of career growth swirling (promotion? raise?? We'll see...). We are <--THIS--> close to home ownership and a promotion/raise would be so helpful in getting that ball rolling. While I'm not necessarily seeing a Florida future any longer...I am seeing a farmhouse and animals - but more importantly, I am seeing wide-open spaces. I cannot wait to open a door and just telling Drake and our dog Blue to run...watching them run across our land until they are just dots in the distance. Drake told me yesterday that he's looking forward to being in the country and seeing all the stars....Bliss.
I'm not sure how I feel about new years resolutions...It seems that most people make there grandiose resolutions and by the second week of the year they feel that they have failed themselves. I like the idea of making goals and guidelines for the coming year and celebrating when the goals come to reality. Ah sure I need to lose weight, eat better...blah blah blah. But in reality I feel that those things will come. Imagine a time where we can go to our backyard and pick apples, pears and some berries and make a salad...knowing that they are free of chemicals and grown with love. That MEANS healthier eating and hopefully will lead to weight loss. So if I set the larger goals...the smaller goals will trickle down. I also think about my goal of keeping better contact with friends and family - but right now, that is so difficult because of the space in this apartment. We don't feel comfortable inviting people over. The place is bursting with just the seven of us in it. However, when we have a farm house with open spaces, indoor and out, we can feel comfortable inviting people over for celebrations...or just because.
While I am thankful for 2010...we made so many memories this year...but we've also had a lot of frustration, heartache and a feeling of being in limbo. It feels good to look forward to a brand new year...a year with good numbers...a year of high expectations. Thank you for coming along for the ride.

Merry Christmas, Eyes Forward...

I could post...but what more can I say than what Marxwell's House already said about our present and future...Read on People!
http://marxwellshouse.blogspot.com/2010/12/merry-christmas-eyes-forward.html

Christmas Eve

Life changing...that's what my communications were yesterday with a realtor and lender. We've been working so hard to recover from our 15 years of raising 5 children, on our own, without outside help (or even help from the girls' bio-mom), at most times on one income (a small one at that), putting each other through college, moving...and now I have a wonderful job, with co-workers that I adore, that comes with an income that makes life and credit building do-able. We've been monitoring our credit for the past few months, watching those magical numbers rise up, ever so slightly. Rumors are swirling that a promotion is in my (very near) future...and Mark has begun his job search, adding to our income.
I've been reading a blog...Cold Antler Farm...the blog of a young woman, realizing her dream of becoming a farmer. She makes you believe that your dreams can become a reality too...When you have a moment - check her year in pictures:
http://coldantlerfarm.blogspot.com/2010/12/year-so-far.html
It was after watching that video that I couldn't wait any longer...I had to find out just how close we were. I looked online and found a realtor (a husband and wife team) who specializes in helping people find small farms in the counties that we are looking at. They guided me to a wonderful lender, who also specializes in credit counseling and helps you understand which debts you need to focus on. Our lender put together a game plan for us and everything looks like we'll be good to go once we get our income taxes back and take the first couple of months of 2011 to work on paying off and paying on time etc. SO we are going to watch the home for sale - work on the plan and HOPEFULLY try and get something going around March. The goal is still to move at the end of the kids' school year -but if we could get a home sooner than that...WOOT!
So here I sit, watching It's a Wonderful Life...and thinking about how it truly is. Our five children are in their beds with visions of sugar plums dancing over their heads. I've got my favorite guy on the couch next to me. My trusty dog is "her chair". A cat sleeping under the tree and other scurrying around here and there. A coating of snow blankets our front lawn.
NORAD says that Santa is heading toward Charleston, SC...so I better be off to bed now.

Nutcracker Suite

15 years ago, on December 17th, 1995, Mark and I went on an amazing date. We had only been dating for around three months. It started with getting all dressed up, having Tiffany take a picture of us in front of our Christmas tree and away we went.
We had a great dinner inside the trolley at the Spaghetti Warehouse, watched our first showing ever of the Dayton Ballet's Nutcracker and ended the night (so I thought) with walk around Lincoln Park, a park in our town that goes crazy with Christmas Lights. They remove their water from the fountains and put lit trees throughout. As we were walking through the trees...holding hands and stopping for the occasional kiss...Mark started with "the talk"...the good talk...the I'm everything he has ever imagine in a partner talk...OH! I thought - this is it! He's going to ask me to marry him! He reaches in his pocket for what I thought could be that little box filled with a band of gold and maybe a diamond that says he wants to be with me forever. But WAIT! It's a long box! Oh crap...I think I'm just getting my early Christmas present...a necklace? a pen set? :-) What could it be? It's a Nutcracker. He wanted me to always remember this night and think about this moment each time I looked at this sweet little Nutcracker, holding a tool box, with a hammer and a beautiful diamond ring! He didn't go for the single diamond either. I was marrying him...but I was also marrying his daughters too and he gave me a beautiful ring with a larger diamond in the center and a smaller one on each side (this was before the past/present/future bands came around and he had to have my ring specially created for me). He got down on one knee and asked me the most wonderful question I've ever been asked (by the most wonderful man I've ever known)...and of course I answered YES!
Last night, we were able to recreate that date with a couple of tag-alongs. Tiff, Kait, Gage, Drake and Cora - all seven of us were able to have a great Spaghetti Warehouse dinner and watch the 7:30 showing of the Nutcracker (the kids all stayed awake, loved the mice and the sheep and toe shoes and truly enjoyed the ballet) and because it was tremendously cold we drove (rather than walk) through Lincoln Park to see the lights. It was incredible to experience that night again with all of our kids.
It has been a crazy 15 years, lots of ups and of course some downs, five kids, a handful of moves - we are working on our biggest venture yet. One of the kids asked me if I still would have said "yes" and as I looked around at all those faces, thinking about how I'm the luckiest woman ever my answer was "Absolutely" and then I was asked if I would have done anything different...looking at those same sweet faces and hearing all of our laughter my answer was "Never"...here's some pics for your enjoyment.

Mark and Shelby - December 1995

Mark and Shelby - December 2010 (my how we've changed!)

In our seats, waiting for the show to start!

Princess dress...combat boots - Oh Yeah!

Look what we made! Five amazing people!!! These kids are going to do incredible things when they grow up.
I'm so excited to see what their futures hold.

The WHOLE crew!

Mark and Shelby milestones:
Sept. 1995 - We met
Oct. 1995 - We moved in together
Dec. 1995 - We got engaged
July 1996 - We got married in Lincoln Park, the same place we got engaged so the girls could be a part of our special day
Dec. 1996 - We had our wedding ceremony with the rest of the family (yes, we celebrate both anniversaries)
Nov. 1997 - We got pregnant with Gage!
Aug. 1998 - We had Gage...on August 8th, 1998...he was 10 pounds 1.2 ounces
Dec. 1998 - We got custody of Tiff
June 1999 - We got custody of Kait
Oct. 2000 - We moved to Fox Hunt Apartments
Nov. 2000 - We had Drake...on Nov. 10, 2000...he was born nearly 4 weeks early and was still 7 pounds 7 ounces
Fall 2001 - Shelby started back to college
Fall 2003 - Mark started back to college
Oct. 2003 - We had Cora...on Oct. 24th, 2003...born two weeks early and was 8 pounds 8 ounces 2005 - Moved back to our house on Culver
Early 2005 - Tiffany moved out
June 2006 - Shelby graduated from Wright State University
June 2006 - We moved to Florida, Shelby started working for Truefire.
Fall 2006 - Mark started University of South Florida
Oct. 2006 - Kait moved out
2007 - Mark worked at Great Explorations
Fall 2008 - Moved back to Ohio
Nov. 2008 - We moved into our current apartment
Dec. 2008 - Shelby started working for Ecos
Jan. 2009 - Mark started back at Wright State to finish his degree
June 2009 - Kait moved back in with us :-)
June 2010 - Mark graduated from college
Dec. 2010 - Tiff moved back in and the whole family is back together.
Dec. 18th 2010 - Recreated our engagement night with the whole family.
....and for the future...here's hoping that in June of 2011 we will be buying our farm and establishing our homestead.
WHEW!
Happy Sunday all...five more days until Christmas Eve!!!!!

Adjusting

We are working on adjusting to all seven of us being under one roof again. I thought there was supposed to be a honeymoon period where everyone is on their best behavior for a bit before all hell breaks loose! :-) Ok...well all hell hasn't broken loose (yet) - but my house is definitely a bit chaotic right now. We have a daughter that moved home...she has been on her own for the past 4 years. She has moved from apartment to apartment, roommate to roommate...No real responsibility to anyone other than herself and certainly not having to answer to her parents. Not that we micro manage our children nor do we have these tremendous expectations - we just have and expect respect. Meaning - if we aren't going to be home, we will tell you our plan - so you don't worry and we expect the same from her. I'm not sure she totally gets that. She is also used to being able to make a mess and clean it when it is convenient to her - however, when you live in a tiny place with a family of seven, even the smallest mess can seem like a mountain of clutter. She and her sister work different shifts and there is this constant flux of people getting ready for work or coming home from work - figuring out who is going to be where/when. There is a wild mix of personalities too - and too many Alphas if you get my point. (*wink)
I'm hoping this works - I love having her here we all just need to...adjust.

My Apartment is Like a Clown Car

So I don't know if I've mentioned...but the place we live in is TINY. When I picked it out, I was thinking it was just going to be me and the three little ones. Mark was planning on going back to Florida temporarily to get his degree and this was meant to be VERY temporary. So I signed the lease...and Mark decided to stay (YAY!...Best...Decision...Ever) - but the apartment got ever so slightly smaller. And then Kait graduated from high school and decided she didn't want to live with/around her bio-mom any longer (Best Decision Ever) - but the apartment got ever so slightly smaller. Did I mention that she brought her cat along with her? To add to the other three cats we already have, and the dog, and the rat :-)
...So then tonight I received a phone call. "Hi, um...I need to talk...um I know this is going to be a shock..." In my head, while I'm talking to my 23 year old daughter, I'm thinking I'm going to become a grandmother...but the conversation turned to..."and well, can I move back home?" (Best Decision Ever) and our apartment is getting ready to get ever so slightly smaller...Did I mention she asked if she could bring her cat? I drew a hazy line in the sand and said "Please try and find a home for the cat".
Looks like fate might be pointing us in a new direction soon. Where's my farm house?